Like a lot of other people, I'm not perfect. Here is a non-exhaustive list of the reasons why this is true: I don't like team sports because I'm always the weakest link. I'm terrible at any and all forms of art; any attempt at craft projects make me frustrated and cranky. I am not good at deferred gratification; when I want something, I want it now. My sense of direction is startlingly bad. I spend too much time checking my texts, e-mails, and Facebook notifications on my phone. I don't get enough sleep on the weekends. I spend too much of my gym time doing cardio and not enough on strength training, which explains my increasingly disturbing amount of flab (an extra layer for the winter? Sure, we'll go with that). Although I'm an okay dresser, I can never pull off looking "fancy", and my ability to accessorize leaves a lot to be desired. I'm nosy. Sometimes my mouth works faster than my brain, an unfortunate fact which some people refer to as having no filter. My hair gets all over EVERYTHING. I can't remember the last time I made my bed. My idea of cooking a real meal is throwing pre-packaged tortellini into a pot of boiling water. I have zero self-control. Unlike a startlingly high proportion of my friends, I don't and never will have a PhD, MD, JD, or anything else with a D.
But...
You can count on me to be the among the first to RSVP to your event... and I'll show up with my best "party face" on. I'll call you back if I don't answer the first time. I'll remind you why he was never good enough for you - because obviously he wasn't. Even if it's been a year since I've seen you, I know we will pick up right where we left off. I'll try to strike a balance between making you laugh and letting you cry. When I like your outfit, I'll let you know. I'll remember your birthday. Actually, I'll probably plan your party.
I'm not good at most things. I hope, though, that I'm pretty decent at the important things.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Sunday, November 4, 2012
My A-List
On Friday night, I was standing with three friends in one of the swankiest bars in Minneapolis. We'd never been there before, but we'd heard good things and wanted to give it a try. We were enjoying immaculately-made expensive drinks and having ridiculously great conversations. It was a perfect night.
And then the A-Listers walked in. You know who I'm talking about. They're gorgeous, tall, extremely well-dressed... they have money, they have power, they have influence. They don't WALK into a bar; they saunter in. Heads turn. Surely they are coming from an "event" of some sort, and likely are just passing through this bar for a drink, on their way to the next big thing. They're people that my friends and I don't actually KNOW, but do know OF.
Which makes me think: I wonder if ANYONE really knows them. We're judging them by their exterior. We're assuming that because they LOOK and ACT completely put-together, they actually are. If we really sat down and talked to them, we'd probably find that they have insecurities and struggles and who knows what else. Maybe we'd have more in common than we think. But maybe not. And maybe it doesn't matter, because....
I have my own A-List: The people in my life who enhance every experience; who are the first ones on the invite list when I'm hosting a party. They're the people I can relate to, who understand the things I struggle with. The people with whom I share inside jokes and who know that my favorite drink is Malibu diet. People who can read between the lines when I'm having a hard time articulating my thoughts. The people who bring out the best in me, and vice versa. People who share similar interests and values, and who love to have fun. People who I can text at a moment's notice and meet for a walk around the lake or a cup of coffee. People who make me know that I am never alone.
My own A-Listers are a lot like me. They're not fancy or powerful. They have influence, but not in the same way as the "actual" A-Listers. I don't even know if they "have money" or not, and I don't care. They're as comfortable showing up in shorts and a t-shirt as they are in a bow-tie or a fancy dress.
I don't need or even want to be well-known, popular, or influential. But I do need my people, my A-List. And I'm thankful for the ever-expanding number of people on this list. SO thankful.
And as for the TRUE A-Listers... I hope they have their own people, too. Because even if you are "really, really, really, ridiculously good-looking", you still need true friends.
And then the A-Listers walked in. You know who I'm talking about. They're gorgeous, tall, extremely well-dressed... they have money, they have power, they have influence. They don't WALK into a bar; they saunter in. Heads turn. Surely they are coming from an "event" of some sort, and likely are just passing through this bar for a drink, on their way to the next big thing. They're people that my friends and I don't actually KNOW, but do know OF.
Which makes me think: I wonder if ANYONE really knows them. We're judging them by their exterior. We're assuming that because they LOOK and ACT completely put-together, they actually are. If we really sat down and talked to them, we'd probably find that they have insecurities and struggles and who knows what else. Maybe we'd have more in common than we think. But maybe not. And maybe it doesn't matter, because....
I have my own A-List: The people in my life who enhance every experience; who are the first ones on the invite list when I'm hosting a party. They're the people I can relate to, who understand the things I struggle with. The people with whom I share inside jokes and who know that my favorite drink is Malibu diet. People who can read between the lines when I'm having a hard time articulating my thoughts. The people who bring out the best in me, and vice versa. People who share similar interests and values, and who love to have fun. People who I can text at a moment's notice and meet for a walk around the lake or a cup of coffee. People who make me know that I am never alone.
My own A-Listers are a lot like me. They're not fancy or powerful. They have influence, but not in the same way as the "actual" A-Listers. I don't even know if they "have money" or not, and I don't care. They're as comfortable showing up in shorts and a t-shirt as they are in a bow-tie or a fancy dress.
I don't need or even want to be well-known, popular, or influential. But I do need my people, my A-List. And I'm thankful for the ever-expanding number of people on this list. SO thankful.
And as for the TRUE A-Listers... I hope they have their own people, too. Because even if you are "really, really, really, ridiculously good-looking", you still need true friends.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
For Better, For Worse.... For All.
The worst week of my life happened during what was supposed to have been one of the best times of my life.
Ben and I had just tied the knot. We were settling into our new marriage, our new apartment, our new lives together. The gifts had been unwrapped, the thank-you notes had been sent. We'd been on a wonderful tropical honeymoon. This was what I'd been looking forward to for so long: having a normal, married life... sharing everything with the person I loved more than anyone else.
And then Ben got sick. It started off with what seemed to be a mild flu... fever, achy, terrible cough. But it didn't go away. He spent a month going to various doctors, trying to figure out what was wrong. He was diagnosed with pneumonia, and was given large doses of antibiotics, but they didn't help. One day, I got home from work, and he wasn't home. He'd been home sick every day for a couple of weeks, and I immediately knew something was wrong. It turned out he had spiked a fever of 104 and had gone to the ER.
Ben was admitted into the hospital that Friday evening. He explained his symptoms to yet another doctor, and was given the same antibiotic that hadn't been working.... this time through an IV. He was in the hospital for over a week while doctors literally argued about what was wrong with him. With every day that passed, it seemed like the working diagnosis got scarier and scarier. A lot of the diseases that they thought he had were potentially life-threatening. Meanwhile, his symptoms were getting worse and there was still no consensus about what the problem was, or how to treat it. I remember calling my dad one day and telling him that I was afraid that I would become a 25 year-old widow.
Eventually, a very intuitive doctor ordered a test that resulted in the diagnosis of Blastomycosis... a rare form of fungal pneumonia in his lung, which didn't respond to the same antibiotics that are used for normal bacterial pneumonia. Untreated, it would have spread to other parts of his body and eventually would have killed him. With treatment, he was able to be discharged and eventually made a full recovery.
He stayed in the hospital for over a week. During that time, we fell into a routine. I'd come to the hospital directly from work each day, and would stay all evening, until it was time for him to go to bed. Visiting hours were long over, but I was able to stay because I was his wife. We tried to make it as normal as possible... playing games, watching TV, talking about that day's events. We were in this together. In sickness and in health. We were both scared, but being able to be there with Ben, through the physical sickness and the resulting emotional repercussions, was truly the only thing that kept us grounded. Although we were frustrated about the lack of a diagnosis, the doctors, nurses, and other healthcare providers treated us with respect and as a family unit.
But what if we hadn't been married? Would the hospital administration have let me stay with him? Would they have treated me as his family? What would have happened if he'd been all alone during that time? What if I'D been all alone during that time?
What if we were a same-sex couple?
There are 515 statutes in Minnesota that discriminate against same-sex couples who are unable to get married in our state. A number of them have to do with health care and hospital visitation rights. I honestly don't know if Ben and I would have been treated the same way in the hospital if we were a same-sex couple. But I do know that our ability to be together during that time, well beyond regular visiting hours, was what held us both together. I don't even want to think about the alternative.
No one should go through this sort of thing alone. When Ben and I took our marriage vows, it was for better or for worse. All committed couples deserve to take, and heed, that vow.
If you're in a legal, heterosexual marriage, you have 515 state benefits that your fellow citizens in same-sex partnerships do not. If the constitution is amended to preclude same-sex couples from getting married, thousands of Minnesotans will lose the hope of ever receiving these same rights that we so easily take for granted. Like being able to be a part of our spouses' medical emergencies and decisions.
Please think about that when you're casting your ballot next Tuesday.
Ben and I had just tied the knot. We were settling into our new marriage, our new apartment, our new lives together. The gifts had been unwrapped, the thank-you notes had been sent. We'd been on a wonderful tropical honeymoon. This was what I'd been looking forward to for so long: having a normal, married life... sharing everything with the person I loved more than anyone else.
And then Ben got sick. It started off with what seemed to be a mild flu... fever, achy, terrible cough. But it didn't go away. He spent a month going to various doctors, trying to figure out what was wrong. He was diagnosed with pneumonia, and was given large doses of antibiotics, but they didn't help. One day, I got home from work, and he wasn't home. He'd been home sick every day for a couple of weeks, and I immediately knew something was wrong. It turned out he had spiked a fever of 104 and had gone to the ER.
Ben was admitted into the hospital that Friday evening. He explained his symptoms to yet another doctor, and was given the same antibiotic that hadn't been working.... this time through an IV. He was in the hospital for over a week while doctors literally argued about what was wrong with him. With every day that passed, it seemed like the working diagnosis got scarier and scarier. A lot of the diseases that they thought he had were potentially life-threatening. Meanwhile, his symptoms were getting worse and there was still no consensus about what the problem was, or how to treat it. I remember calling my dad one day and telling him that I was afraid that I would become a 25 year-old widow.
Eventually, a very intuitive doctor ordered a test that resulted in the diagnosis of Blastomycosis... a rare form of fungal pneumonia in his lung, which didn't respond to the same antibiotics that are used for normal bacterial pneumonia. Untreated, it would have spread to other parts of his body and eventually would have killed him. With treatment, he was able to be discharged and eventually made a full recovery.
He stayed in the hospital for over a week. During that time, we fell into a routine. I'd come to the hospital directly from work each day, and would stay all evening, until it was time for him to go to bed. Visiting hours were long over, but I was able to stay because I was his wife. We tried to make it as normal as possible... playing games, watching TV, talking about that day's events. We were in this together. In sickness and in health. We were both scared, but being able to be there with Ben, through the physical sickness and the resulting emotional repercussions, was truly the only thing that kept us grounded. Although we were frustrated about the lack of a diagnosis, the doctors, nurses, and other healthcare providers treated us with respect and as a family unit.
But what if we hadn't been married? Would the hospital administration have let me stay with him? Would they have treated me as his family? What would have happened if he'd been all alone during that time? What if I'D been all alone during that time?
What if we were a same-sex couple?
There are 515 statutes in Minnesota that discriminate against same-sex couples who are unable to get married in our state. A number of them have to do with health care and hospital visitation rights. I honestly don't know if Ben and I would have been treated the same way in the hospital if we were a same-sex couple. But I do know that our ability to be together during that time, well beyond regular visiting hours, was what held us both together. I don't even want to think about the alternative.
No one should go through this sort of thing alone. When Ben and I took our marriage vows, it was for better or for worse. All committed couples deserve to take, and heed, that vow.
If you're in a legal, heterosexual marriage, you have 515 state benefits that your fellow citizens in same-sex partnerships do not. If the constitution is amended to preclude same-sex couples from getting married, thousands of Minnesotans will lose the hope of ever receiving these same rights that we so easily take for granted. Like being able to be a part of our spouses' medical emergencies and decisions.
Please think about that when you're casting your ballot next Tuesday.
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
If The Marriage Amendment Passes...
Today, I watched two television advertisements that were launched by Minnesota For Marriage, the campaign that supports the passage of the constitutional amendment that would forever preclude so many people from entering into the bond of legal marriage. I had an actual physiological reaction. My whole body felt cold, my palms were sweaty, and I could feel my heart pounding. I also felt very emotionally confused. I couldn't quite define my feeling as anger, or sadness, or extreme worry.... it was more like a combination of all of all of these.
Ever since this issue became a ballot measure, most of us have been feeling very positively about how it will turn out. Almost all of our peers are voting no. You can hardly throw a rock in our city without hitting an orange Vote No lawn sign. Hundreds of faith organizations have stood up against the amendment. There have been fundraising and awareness-raising events nearly every day lately. The momentum has been growing and growing, and there's an undercurrent of hope and positivity.
But we live in a bubble, and that bubble does not represent our entire state. And the reality is that we are behind in the polls. If the election was today, we would lose. And these hurtful advertisements are not going to help.
I recently read an article written by a Minnesotan woman who was asked how she would feel if the marriage amendment passes next month. She had some very eloquent things to say about what that outcome would (and would NOT) do to her family. And that prompted me to think about my own response to that question.
I don't really know how anyone who has been invested in this fight can be fully prepared for the possibility that we will lose. I do know that I will feel disappointed in my fellow Minnesotans, and I will feel disappointed in myself for not doing enough.
The outcome of the election won't affect my own marriage, so it could be said that I would not be "personally harmed" if it passes. And that's true, sort of. I'm not pretending to know first-hand what it feels like to be systematically discriminated against. I'm not pretending to be impacted in the same profound way that thousands of other Minnesotans would.
But I know what this means to the people who would be personally harmed. Most are strangers. Some are colleagues, neighbors, acquaintances, former classmates. A lot are friends. A few are people I love with all my heart. For all of these people, the passage of the amendment would mean that a majority of Minnesota voters think that their relationships shouldn't be legally validated. That their families are somehow less than mine.
I don't understand the arguments presented by the opposition. I don't understand why anyone would want to write discrimination into the constitution, or especially why anyone, regardless of their stance on the issue, considers the amendment necessary given the current state and federal laws which already prohibit legal same-sex marriage.
It is an uphill battle, but I'm still hopeful that Minnesotans will stand up for what is right and will be the first state to vote down this proposed amendment. But this won't happen simply by "hoping". Please join me in donating and volunteering in whatever capacity you can. www.mnunited.org.
Ever since this issue became a ballot measure, most of us have been feeling very positively about how it will turn out. Almost all of our peers are voting no. You can hardly throw a rock in our city without hitting an orange Vote No lawn sign. Hundreds of faith organizations have stood up against the amendment. There have been fundraising and awareness-raising events nearly every day lately. The momentum has been growing and growing, and there's an undercurrent of hope and positivity.
But we live in a bubble, and that bubble does not represent our entire state. And the reality is that we are behind in the polls. If the election was today, we would lose. And these hurtful advertisements are not going to help.
I recently read an article written by a Minnesotan woman who was asked how she would feel if the marriage amendment passes next month. She had some very eloquent things to say about what that outcome would (and would NOT) do to her family. And that prompted me to think about my own response to that question.
I don't really know how anyone who has been invested in this fight can be fully prepared for the possibility that we will lose. I do know that I will feel disappointed in my fellow Minnesotans, and I will feel disappointed in myself for not doing enough.
The outcome of the election won't affect my own marriage, so it could be said that I would not be "personally harmed" if it passes. And that's true, sort of. I'm not pretending to know first-hand what it feels like to be systematically discriminated against. I'm not pretending to be impacted in the same profound way that thousands of other Minnesotans would.
But I know what this means to the people who would be personally harmed. Most are strangers. Some are colleagues, neighbors, acquaintances, former classmates. A lot are friends. A few are people I love with all my heart. For all of these people, the passage of the amendment would mean that a majority of Minnesota voters think that their relationships shouldn't be legally validated. That their families are somehow less than mine.
I don't understand the arguments presented by the opposition. I don't understand why anyone would want to write discrimination into the constitution, or especially why anyone, regardless of their stance on the issue, considers the amendment necessary given the current state and federal laws which already prohibit legal same-sex marriage.
It is an uphill battle, but I'm still hopeful that Minnesotans will stand up for what is right and will be the first state to vote down this proposed amendment. But this won't happen simply by "hoping". Please join me in donating and volunteering in whatever capacity you can. www.mnunited.org.
Friday, September 14, 2012
21 Things I'm Thankful For
I've been thinking a lot lately about thankfulness. I feel SO thankful for so many things, and lately I've felt like it's been hard to contain my gratitude. I put this list together of the Top 21 Things I'm Thankful For, initially thinking I'd write one every day and post it around Thanksgiving time... but once I started, I couldn't stop. These are not in order of importance or really in any order at all. But they all contribute to the incredibly vast beauty that I am so lucky to experience.
1. The World's Best Husband. I can't even describe how lucky I am to have Ben. He's the best partner anyone could ever ask for, in so many ways. And really the all-around best PERSON that I know.
2. Living in Minneapolis, which I truly believe is one of the best places on earth.
3. Education. This can take a variety of forms. I'm thankful for both my formal higher education, as well as the drive to be a life-long learner and the small things I learn every day.
4. My Thursday Night Dinner (TND) friends. Even though TND is a rare occurrence these days, I'm grateful for this amazing group of women who are enriching, life-long friends.
5. Running. Running makes me feel good emotionally and physically. Also, I am very thankful for my running buddies!
6. My long-distance friends, who provide opportunities to travel and visit! In the past year, I've visited 8 friends in 3 different locations.
7. The stable and secure jobs that both Ben and I are lucky enough to have.
8. Jacob's Well. Relevant, Honest, Thinking, and Casual.
9. My "girly group". I look forward to Tuesday nights and meaningful discussions with amazing women.
10. The many new friendships I've made this year....
11..... Especially the person who has taught me (among many other things) the definition of the term "best friend", and who complements and parallels me in so many ways.
12. Social media, which enables me to make and keep connections.
13. Chocolate. Because let's be honest, life would suck without chocolate.
14. My little sister, who used to be just a baby and has grown up in every way imaginable. She is a tiny package of brilliance and amazingness, and I've never been prouder of anyone.
15. My health. Once in awhile I'm reminded of how easy it is to take this for granted, and yet how important it is.
16. Lake Calhoun. I love this lake. This summer I've run around it, walked around it, biked around it, kayaked, canoed, and paddleboarded on it, and swam in it.
17. My book club. The opportunity to read books that I normally would never pick up.
18. Extroversion. I have some personality traits that admittedly might not make it into the list of things I'm thankful for (my husband would probably agree!), but I am really happy to be an extrovert. I love that I get my energy from being with people and that I love socializing with lots of groups of people.
19. Theater in Minneapolis. The Twin Cities has the 2nd largest number of theater seats per capita (behind NYC), I'm happy to say that I have sat in dozens of them.
20. My parents, who have been constants my entire life. Not everyone is that lucky.
21. A past that I look back on and smile about, a future in which I anticipate wonderful things, and a present that I continually live in and thrive in.
1. The World's Best Husband. I can't even describe how lucky I am to have Ben. He's the best partner anyone could ever ask for, in so many ways. And really the all-around best PERSON that I know.
2. Living in Minneapolis, which I truly believe is one of the best places on earth.
3. Education. This can take a variety of forms. I'm thankful for both my formal higher education, as well as the drive to be a life-long learner and the small things I learn every day.
4. My Thursday Night Dinner (TND) friends. Even though TND is a rare occurrence these days, I'm grateful for this amazing group of women who are enriching, life-long friends.
5. Running. Running makes me feel good emotionally and physically. Also, I am very thankful for my running buddies!
6. My long-distance friends, who provide opportunities to travel and visit! In the past year, I've visited 8 friends in 3 different locations.
7. The stable and secure jobs that both Ben and I are lucky enough to have.
8. Jacob's Well. Relevant, Honest, Thinking, and Casual.
9. My "girly group". I look forward to Tuesday nights and meaningful discussions with amazing women.
10. The many new friendships I've made this year....
11..... Especially the person who has taught me (among many other things) the definition of the term "best friend", and who complements and parallels me in so many ways.
12. Social media, which enables me to make and keep connections.
13. Chocolate. Because let's be honest, life would suck without chocolate.
14. My little sister, who used to be just a baby and has grown up in every way imaginable. She is a tiny package of brilliance and amazingness, and I've never been prouder of anyone.
15. My health. Once in awhile I'm reminded of how easy it is to take this for granted, and yet how important it is.
16. Lake Calhoun. I love this lake. This summer I've run around it, walked around it, biked around it, kayaked, canoed, and paddleboarded on it, and swam in it.
17. My book club. The opportunity to read books that I normally would never pick up.
18. Extroversion. I have some personality traits that admittedly might not make it into the list of things I'm thankful for (my husband would probably agree!), but I am really happy to be an extrovert. I love that I get my energy from being with people and that I love socializing with lots of groups of people.
19. Theater in Minneapolis. The Twin Cities has the 2nd largest number of theater seats per capita (behind NYC), I'm happy to say that I have sat in dozens of them.
20. My parents, who have been constants my entire life. Not everyone is that lucky.
21. A past that I look back on and smile about, a future in which I anticipate wonderful things, and a present that I continually live in and thrive in.
Sunday, September 9, 2012
Shakin' off the Devil
While running today, the Florence and the Machine song Shake it Out came up on my iPod shuffle. This is a great song. Every time I hear it, I am struck by this lyric: "It's hard to dance with the Devil on your back, so shake him off".
This line really resonates with me and makes me think of the "Devils" that I need to shake off in order to "dance". And by dance, I mean be the most authentic, productive, and positive version of myself.
One of my major Devils is self-consciousness, fear of judgement, and an over-focus on what people think of me. It's appropriate that the line is "It's hard to DANCE with the Devil on your back", because the most concrete example of how this is exemplified in my life involves literal dancing. Last night, I was reminiscing with a close long-term friend about how she once gave me dance lessons in the apartment we shared, and about how I would never, ever dance in any capacity unless I'd had some "liquid courage". I know I'm not a great dancer, and for a looong time, I would be the girl standing on the edge of the dance floor, watching the fun happen without me... because I was too self-conscious and thought people would judge me for my sub-par dance skills. Result: I missed out on a lot of fun. Fast-forward to 2012, and the party we were at last night. Jill suggested that we start a dance party, and she, the birthday boy, and I jammed out in the living room for awhile (while everyone else just watched). And I didn't care how ridiculous I looked.
Another one of the Devils that I need to shake off is comparing myself to other people. A prime example is "stomach models". I coined this term years ago, referring to the many people who run around the Chain of Lakes (especially Calhoun) clad in tiny shorts and sports bras, with no body fat, toned stomachs, perfect running form, and a super fast pace. The kind of women that I simultaneously want to hate, and want to BE. However, never once has watching those women (and the negative thoughts that go along with doing so) made my run better, made me faster, or made me happier. All it does it make me feel inferior. A more positive approach would be to focus on my own run, and the privilege of being healthy and able to run in such a beautiful city.
I think we all have some form of Devil that we need to shake off our backs. Maybe it's a negative person who isn't doing any good in your life. Maybe it's perfectionism. Maybe it's fear of the unknown. Maybe it's addiction (I'm not talking about drugs, but anything that's causing an imbalance). Maybe your Devils are similar to mine: self-consciousness, need for approval, and comparison to others.
Recognizing these things in our lives is the first step toward self-improvement. If we don't realize what's holding us back, we'll never be able to move forward. Let's define our Devils instead of letting them define us. And once we know what they are, let's shake 'em off, so we can dance.
This line really resonates with me and makes me think of the "Devils" that I need to shake off in order to "dance". And by dance, I mean be the most authentic, productive, and positive version of myself.
One of my major Devils is self-consciousness, fear of judgement, and an over-focus on what people think of me. It's appropriate that the line is "It's hard to DANCE with the Devil on your back", because the most concrete example of how this is exemplified in my life involves literal dancing. Last night, I was reminiscing with a close long-term friend about how she once gave me dance lessons in the apartment we shared, and about how I would never, ever dance in any capacity unless I'd had some "liquid courage". I know I'm not a great dancer, and for a looong time, I would be the girl standing on the edge of the dance floor, watching the fun happen without me... because I was too self-conscious and thought people would judge me for my sub-par dance skills. Result: I missed out on a lot of fun. Fast-forward to 2012, and the party we were at last night. Jill suggested that we start a dance party, and she, the birthday boy, and I jammed out in the living room for awhile (while everyone else just watched). And I didn't care how ridiculous I looked.
Another one of the Devils that I need to shake off is comparing myself to other people. A prime example is "stomach models". I coined this term years ago, referring to the many people who run around the Chain of Lakes (especially Calhoun) clad in tiny shorts and sports bras, with no body fat, toned stomachs, perfect running form, and a super fast pace. The kind of women that I simultaneously want to hate, and want to BE. However, never once has watching those women (and the negative thoughts that go along with doing so) made my run better, made me faster, or made me happier. All it does it make me feel inferior. A more positive approach would be to focus on my own run, and the privilege of being healthy and able to run in such a beautiful city.
I think we all have some form of Devil that we need to shake off our backs. Maybe it's a negative person who isn't doing any good in your life. Maybe it's perfectionism. Maybe it's fear of the unknown. Maybe it's addiction (I'm not talking about drugs, but anything that's causing an imbalance). Maybe your Devils are similar to mine: self-consciousness, need for approval, and comparison to others.
Recognizing these things in our lives is the first step toward self-improvement. If we don't realize what's holding us back, we'll never be able to move forward. Let's define our Devils instead of letting them define us. And once we know what they are, let's shake 'em off, so we can dance.
Sunday, August 5, 2012
30 Before 30 Adventures
For the past 30 days, I have been working on a “30 before 30”
project: Try, experience, or do one new thing every day for the 30 days leading
up to my 30th birthday. This
is what I’ve been up to over the past month!
Friday July 6 – Took a yoga class. Almost everyone I know besides me has taken
yoga classes many times over, but this was actually my first one! I felt like I looked pretty dumb and
inflexible, and the time seemed to go much slower than it usually does with
classes at the gym. But, I certainly can
see the benefits of practicing it long-term, so I may give it another try.
Saturday July 7 – Went canoeing on Lake Calhoun. This was really fun. It was the first sub-90 degree day in at
least a week, and absolutely beautiful, so I headed off to Lake Calhoun with
two friends to rent a canoe. I’d been
canoeing before, but never on the Minneapolis chain of lakes. I love so many things about Minneapolis, but one
thing that is REALLY unique is that you can be right in the middle of the city,
yet feel completely surrounded by wilderness.
 |
| One of my thank-you notes |
Monday July 9 – Rode a Nice Ride bike. So, the truth is, I hadn’t been on any kind
of bike (except a stationary one) for about 20 years. So riding a bike at all was pretty much a
“new thing”. Renting Nice Rides was more
or less just because neither Ben nor I own a functional bike. We went out around Calhoun on a beautiful
night. I was a little shaky at first,
but after a while I really liked it!
 | |
| Holding the cherry! |
Tuesday July 10 – Went to the Walker Sculputer Garden and
took a picture “holding the cherry” of the cherry spoon statue. Okay, full disclosure: my original plan was to
take a picture CLIMBING on the cherry spoon. But a few things were working
against that plan: 1. My own guilt about
the idea of climbing on art. 2. The closed-circuit security system. 3. The pond
beneath the spoon. So, this was more of
a second choice activity. But the
picture turned out pretty cool and it was fun to spend time with a friend in
the sculpture garden.
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| Losing Powerball tix |
Wednesday July 11 – Bought two Powerball tickets. At 9:59, I watched the Powerball drawing with
a friend. Unfortunately, beginners luck
did not strike this time, and I ended up $4 poorer instead of 80,000,000
richer!
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| Chocolate facials! |
Friday July 13 – Visited a new city. Ben and I flew in to Ann Arbor Michigan to
celebrate the wedding of a close friend of mine. This is a great little town and I have been
wanting to visit for several years now- so glad that I finally did!
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| Cigars and whiskey with Alicia |
Saturday July 14 – Smoked a cigar and drank whiskey. This was Ben and my 5 year wedding
anniversary, and the day before the wedding of one of my BFFs. So, the 4 of us celebrated with cigars (first
time EVER smoking one) and whiskey (first time drinking an entire whiskey
drink… I liked it a lot more than I thought).
It was super fun to spend time celebrating with one of our favorite
couples.
Sunday July 15 – Acted as a witness for a marriage. I had the honor of signing the marriage
license as a witness at the wedding of one of my closest friends. It really was a privilege to play this unique
role in the life of a very special couple.
Monday July 16 – Ran a mile barefoot, in 100 degrees. Today’s adventure was SUPPOSED to be
paddleboarding, but the watercrafts weren’t being rented because of wind. So, my friends and I went to the beach, and I
took the opportunity to try barefoot running along Calhoun – something I’ve
wanted to try for a while. I went about
a mile, which was more than enough in 100+ degrees! I’d definitely be open to doing it again.
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| The ingredients for root beer |
Wednesday July 18 – Went to the Aquatennial Torchlight
Parade. This parade is supposed to be
one of the best in the state.
Personally, I thought it was a bit overrated. Highly dominated by princesses and marching
bands. But it was a beautiful night and I was with great friends, so it was
well worth it!
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| On the Foshay Observation deck |
Friday July 20 – CLASSIFIED! (Aren’t all the funnest things??)
Saturday July 21 – Went paddleboarding on the Minneapolis
chain of lakes. Paddleboards are like a
cross between surfboarding and kayaking.
I was afraid that I would fall off, but it actually was really easy and
fun. All four of us got the hang of it
right away, and it was a great way to spend a summer afternoon!
Sunday July 22 – Celebrated a 90th birthday. Today was my grandpa’s 90th
birthday, so I went out for dinner with him and many of my extended family
members to celebrate. I’ve never known
someone who is 90 years old before. My
grandpa has lived an incredible life and is still active and full of energy and
talent. I’m proud to be part of his
family!
Monday July 23 – Gave food to a homeless person. I’ve seen countless people on the street who
clearly are in need. Never before have I
stopped to try to fill that need. I’d
purchased a subway gift card, and today, instead of turning a blind eye, I said
hello and gave him the card. I hope that
tonight he has a full belly.
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| Making gnocchi! |
Tuesday July 24 – Made homemade gnocchi. One of the things I am infamous for is my inability to cook. “Making dinner”, to me, means putting some frozen stir fry in a pan and heating it up. Conversely, my favorite friend is incredibly talented at many creative things, including cooking delicious homemade meals. So, tonight we made our own gnocchi. It took a full two hours from start to finish, but it was delicious!!
Wednesday July 25 – Got a psychic reading. This was a bit of a bust. My psychic didn’t really hone in on my primary personality traits or the characteristics of my relationships, and stated a few things which were blatantly inaccurate… making it difficult to trust the other parts of the reading. I’m still glad I gave it a try, but probably won’t be going back to her any time soon!
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| Jumping! |
Thursday July 26 - Went to a trampoline park. A group of us went to Sky Zone in Plymouth to
bounce on their 3-dimensional trampolines.
We were the oldest people there, besides those who were there with their
children, but we didn’t care. It was a
ton of fun.
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| Shooting a gun! In a dress! |
Friday July 27 – Shot a gun.
I went with three girl friends and my husband to Bill’s Gun Range in
Robbinsdale. I was incredibly nervous,
but after I got the hang of it, it was
actually pretty fun. One of those things
that I am glad to have done, but probably will never do again!
Saturday July 28 – Mowed a lawn. So, I’m a little bit of a princess, and I’d
never mowed a lawn in my life until today.
I figured it was about time. I
didn’t like it one little bit, and I didn’t do a very good job. But it DID make me develop a new appreciation
for the way Ben keeps our lawn looking like a bed of green carpet!
Sunday July 29 – Went tubing down the Cannon River. My initial goal was to tube down the Apple
River (which is where Ben picked up a life-threatening communicable disease on
his bachelor party 5 years ago… so who WOULDN’T want to do that again?!), but
opted for the less-disgusting Cannon River.
Ten hours and many shenanigans later, I got home and immediately
crashed.
Monday July 30 – CENSORED!!
Tuesday July 31 – Fasted.
I was on a water and juice diet from 6 pm yesterday until about 5:15
today (at which time someone offered me a cookie, and who am I to turn down a
cookie?!). I didn’t really get hungry
until around lunch time, but it also wasn’t a particularly meaningful
experience, as it wasn’t part of a spiritual practice or anything.
Wednesday August 1 – Had my eyebrows waxed. I’ve never really needed to do it because my
hair is so light, but I figured it was worth trying. Results one hour later: a little red!
Thursday August 2 -
Went through a coffee shop drive-thru and paid for the person behind me. The cashier was a little confused, but I’m
pretty sure it worked out. Hopefully the
recipient of free coffee had a good start to his or her day!
Friday August 3 – Ate sushi. I really don't like sea food of any kind, so I put this one off until the end. But I felt like I really should try it because I never had and so many people rave about how delicious it is. The only one I could force myself to put in my mouth was a veggie role, which I'm not sure even technically counts.
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| Celebrating 30! |
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